I have gotten the pleasure of being able to chat with Panda online while on webcam for the past two weeks and I am so grateful for this technology.  Although it took me awhile to convince him we (or at least I) needed this, he finally decided to go for it and I’m quite confident he hasn’t looked back.  Our chosen medium of video chatting is TokBox, which is what Meebo uses.  I used to sign on to my AIM, MSN, and other accounts by using the in-browser service so I could access it from any computer, but for some reason it doesn’t seem to load at the office, so I have had to revert to using Trillian.  Unfortunately, due to compatibility issues, I can’t video with him on that, so we make our way over to TokBox to see each other.

I can’t even begin to express the joy it brings me to be able to see Panda’s face and use my own facial expressions and body language to interact with him.  So much is lost when our lives are too digitized, so it’s nice to use technology in a way that brings us more together rather than keeps us apart.  Being so far away from him is tough, but because I can still see him and hear him, it makes things a lot more bearable.  Perhaps it is also because I know that we can do this, so it’s almost an expectation, whereas I’m sure in the past, couples dealt just as well when they had nothing more than snail mail or brief phone conversations.  However, in this day and age, it is becoming far more normal to be thousands of miles apart, but just a few clicks away.  Thank goodness for the internet (all things free on it).

I’m even cheesy enough to be happy with working away at my tasks at my office desk as he scribbles away at his homework at his dorm desk.  We don’t need to constantly talk to each other or interact, as long as I can feel he’s near me (in a sense).  I love the accessibility I get this way, being able to see what he’s doing whenever I need a break and say a few words to himas thoughts come to me.  Plus, this has given me a look into his life in a way that I never had access to before.  I never really got to spend much time in his room, but now I am there with him, watching as he struggles to answer tough assignment questions or takes a break for a nap.  There’s something so comforting about that.  It also allows us to show each other things that may not be as well represented in still shots.  I feel so much more connected this way than just typing, though we did share a lot when the written word was all we had.  🙂

Of course, everything has its pros and cons and, for a packrat crazy sentimentalist like me, chatting on webcams means no lasting record of our conversations.  I still value being able to read back on what we wrote to each other, whether it was the notes from before I left or the e-mail updates after I arrived.  Being able to pull out a beautiful card written with a heartfelt message in his handwriting is also a comfort, and I cherish that too.  Even the IMs and e-mails we exchanged have so much character and so many great moments, a constant reminder to me of why he means so much to me.  I’ve been here for a month now and I miss my Panda a lot, but he has made his own sacrifices to help me enjoy myself more while away from him.  And we both have modern technology to thank for that.

Thank you Panda.