There are many skills I have learned throughout my life and plenty of them have been acquired of my own volition.  One of these skills has been (basic) coding.   Back when I was in my “tweens,” I taught myself how to use HTML to create my own websites.  I spent hours upon hours in front of the computer, typing away with various <> tags, making all kinds of nonsense sites that I don’t remember anymore.  Those were the days of GeoCities, Angelfire, and the like and I doubt anything useful or interesting was ever posted.  I was just happy to be given a blank slate and a simple box to type up my HTML.  So off I went, happily coding away.  I remember I used to sit in front of the computer for hours at a time, even pulling some all-nighters, as I browsed the internet learning about hex codes and how scrolling doesn’t show up on all browsers.  I always had a gigantic bag of Chex Mix with me to snack on through the night and my blanket wrapped around me for warmth and comfort as I curled up on the chair.

My first LiveJournal.

As the years went by, such simplistic websites lost their charm and I eventually left them to the wayside.  A few years down the line, I picked up blogging, which hardly required more than centering, bolding, linking, and inserting pictures.  It was very easy to remember the few commands I needed to do everything I needed.  All the other stuff was taken care of for me.  As that picked up, I became more and more interested in customizing my blog for my own needs.  At first I could still plug and chug – many themes were customizable to a certain extent, allowing me to upload my own banner or change the font.  However, to really delve into the design elements that I wanted to control, I now needed to use CSS to create the look I wanted.  I have never quite learned that more sophisticated programming language, so I took it upon myself to discover its workings.  Instead of grabbing a book or reading a tutorial, I just took the codes that had been created as themes already and began tweaking them to fit my desires.  Initially that worked out just fine – all I wanted was a bit of a change in width here, a different look to my link there.  But of course, things don’t always stay so elementary.  My needs developed more and more and what I knew simply wasn’t enough.

The way that I have been learning and teaching myself requires a lot of trial and error.  It’s much like learning the vocabulary of a language similar to one you know already, but then not really understanding the more complicated grammar.  And to make the right effect, you need those complicated sentence structures!  So I’ve hit a bit of a rut where I should probably take the time and effort to start from the beginning and learn all the ins and outs of this language, but I don’t have the patience for it.  As frustrating as it is, I still much enjoy pounding away at the script I have currently, changing and refining things as I go.  My stubbornness keeps me doggedly pursuing this path, even if it’s not the most efficient.

The first theme I was working with.

To me, there’s a certain pleasure to be found in finally getting the right change accomplished this way.  When I get into the process, I really get into it and hours fly by as I try adjusting a number here or reconfiguring a command there.  It’s one of the few times I feel like I’m in a “zone” and truly wholeheartedly focused on something.  I’m the type of person who tends to like to dabble in a lot of things and jump around from project to project, getting a little done here, a little done there.  Every now and then, I find one of the few things that just grabs my attention and keeps me there.  Granted, it does depend on when my whims come and go, and how long this phase lasts, but while it’s here it’s strong and pervasive.  I put up my do not disturb face and go at it until my body is begging for a break or I have an obligation to fulfill.

Tonight, I hit one of those strides, where I just kept fiddling with one of the themes.  I’ve tried and considered a handful of themes so far, but I’m quite picky when it comes to how I want it to look: customizable banner, adjustable width, round and curvy font, two columns

What I'm settling on for now.

only.  The color scheme has to be right as well and I tend not to like any of the extremely graphical backgrounds I’ve seen.  That narrows it down to pretty much no option, so I’ve had to make do with what I’ve found and figure out how to work with it.  I won’t ever be completely satisfied until I learn how to make a theme from scratch or I get someone who knows what they’re doing to create something with all my specifications.  Somewhere down the line I’ll be looking for a complete makeover of my blog interface.  I’ve got some friends who are good at this, so perhaps one of them will have the time to create something for me one day.  Until then… you may find that this theme will switch back and forth as I find ways to edit in what I do want and edit out what I don’t want from the templates I’m using.