Oh, 2012. It’s been quite a year.  There were a lot of highs and lows, ranging from glorious celebrations of love to frustrating work-related challenges.  The year started off normally, then started to dip as I didn’t find enough growth in my career.  So, I decided to quit my job and pursue my entrepreneurial dreams.  I then got a chance to attend my first wedding as an adult, watching my cousin get married in a lovely event.  From there, I began to work on my own ventures, with great highs of productivity and excitement and great lows of little motivation and progress.  What this new lifestyle did afford me was a lot of self-reflection, personal growth, and time with Panda.  What it hasn’t afforded me (yet) was the satisfaction of succeeding by “normal” measures.

It’s definitely been challenging and there seems to be a bit of an inverse relation between quality family time and substantial career growth.  While it’s been a strong year for family, it’s been a weak one for work.  I mean, we all know it’s hard to balance the demands of home and work, but I know it can be a better balance than I’ve managed thus far.  I’ve enjoyed and appreciated the time I get to have with my parents when they’re in town, with Panda when we’re together, and with my cousin who has come to study in the US.  However, I constantly feel judged for the lack of a job that I have and my whole “self-employed” status.  Granted, I haven’t been as motivated and hard-working as I could, but there’s a lot I did do that nobody really knows about.

I’m struggling a bit right now to find my way and figure out where to focus my efforts.  My eBay endeavors have reached a plateau and it doesn’t require as much upkeep anymore, so I need to decide what my next thing will be.  I did just get contacted by someone with an opportunity that could potentially lead to something rewarding, so we’ll see how that pans out.  In the mean time, I’ve been doing some work for Yuzen and should probably put some more time into that.  Now that it’s the end of the year and the holiday season is in full swing, I’m finding it hard to really plan too much more work for the rest of the year.  Between travel plans and birthday/holiday celebrations, I’ll probably be pretty busy.  That doesn’t mean I won’t be thinking and strategizing about the future the whole time!