So many of our peers have gotten engaged recently! There have been three couples since the summer, all of whom met working as Orientation Counselors. That’s how Panda and I, as well as Opti and Doc met! Funny how so many pairs have come from the Orientation Program staff. I’m sure there will be many more to come. There’s something about the whole Orientation thing that seems to really bring together staff.
Just wanted to share. 🙂
I made my temporary pet clams a little pool to chill in.
Close-up of one of them.
They're everywhere! So many potential pets!
In the struggle to find a job to even begin a career with, I’ve had quite a lot of time to think of where I want to go in my professional life. I’ve known for a long time that I want to start my own company (or maybe even many). In fact, I’m going to say I will start my own company. I just haven’t quite settled on what it will be yet, though I’ve been thinking eco-consulting for awhile now. But I’ve realized that that is not what I want to do ultimately. It’s a milestone that I will cross at some point, however well or poorly it goes. But ultimately? I’d like to be an angel investor, making sure the solutions I see in life are executed.
Of course that means that I will need to somehow become super rich first. When I told Ninja that what I really want is to be really rich, he was like, “Duh, don’t we all?” When I went on to explain why, however, he understood that I wasn’t making just a shallow comment. I want to make a difference in this world and there are so many places I can see myself doing that, if only I had the money! I would really just love to spend my time thinking of solutions to problems I see and then finding the best people to execute them. I’d set them up with the resources they need and give them whatever guidance necessary to get them on their way. From there, I’d hope they’d be able to take over and run a profitable and socially-conscious enterprise. If I could do this, then I’d start a company like Mary Qin, Inc., to be a holding company for all those little niche companies I could create.
I’d go about getting a sensible public transportation system, sharing riding system, or something set up for the Los Angeles area to ease the traffic and pollution problems. I’d get an electronic receipt system going so we stop wasting paper on receipts that most people are unlikely to look at and most will just lose anyway. I’d also get that system linked to our credit cards so that whenever we check our bills, we can see the receipt associated with each charge. No more hunting through piles of paper! I could finally get a vocational school for athletes going both here and in the UK, so we could cultivate athletes who are ready for all stages of life. Then I could set up a research think tank where people can submit ideas for researchers to carry out. I guess Google’s kind of already doing this, but it would be free for people to send in ideas and no guarantee on if their submission is chosen (whereas Google’s is contracted). Really I’d love to tackle my “hopelist” and parts of my “ideaslist.”
So here’s to getting a job, being extremely profitable, then setting up a foundation or something to implement the solutions I so dearly want to see.
Sometimes it feels like a really hard game. You zoom past the easy levels, then get stuck on a hard one. photo credit: danimations on flickr
Just yesterday morning I got the news: Thank you for applying, but we have chosen another candidate for the position. Or something to that effect. It feels like so long ago! I had a lot of my hope banking on this job, so it was certainly a let-down that I didn’t get it, after getting so far. I had three wonderful people give me great recommendations and even a fourth one who put in some good words. In the end, it might have come down to exactly what I had feared… not enough professional experience in event planning and scheduling.
I had the passion, I had the drive, I had the excitement and enthusiasm! I just didn’t have the years of experience to back me up. I’m still waiting to hear back regarding feedback on how I was as a candidate so I can improve myself for the next try. I really wish I had gotten this one though – it was perfect for what I want out of life now. At least it didn’t hit me as hard as I thought it would. It helped that I had just heard of some new, exciting opportunities, so now I’m applying for those. Just gotta keep plowing forward!
Ironic then, that last night I listened to a speaker sharing advice on how to live our professional lives and today I listened to a speaker doing much the same. I was oddly inspired, yet weary. Sometimes you know what you should do, but it’s just not the right time emotionally. I felt like that last night, as the pangs of a job not earned hit my subconscious. I didn’t think it was affecting me much, but apparently it was. Let me tell you, it is the most bizarre feeling, to be inspired and discontent at the same time. It’s hard to reconcile. Well, I took those lessons and pondered them on my way home, as I questioned many things in my life. Then today I was feeling much more receptive to the advice presented. I just need time to recover from everything I put into the potential job.
A wonderful event!
Let’s move on to the pointers that the two speakers gave, starting with Jordan Belfort:
~”motion creates emotion” – Put your body physically a certain way and you will start to feel that way. Stand tall and confident and you will feel more confident. Hang your head and look at the ground and you will begin to feel sad. Move how you want to feel and you can create that emotion through body language.
~”act as if” – Whatever your goal is, start acting as if you have already attained it. You will begin to open doors to lead you towards that very goal. (This could work well in line with the advice that tells you to start taking on duties of those above you when you want to get a promotion/raise. Just start working like you already have that job!)
~”where focus goes, energy flows” – The things you focus on, you will pick out more readily than everything else. So focus on what you want to get and don’t expend resources on the rest. We’re great at filtering out things to find what we want, but if we’re preoccupied with our weaknesses or problems, that’s all we’ll see.
~”change the way you look at things and the things you look at will change” – Similar to above. When you focus on the good and what you want, you will go towards it. When you shift focus down to the things holding you back, you will plummet.
The Wolf of Wall Street, as he's known.
~”build a new pattern” – From our youth, we develop patterns. Patterns of thought, patterns of behavior, patterns of expectations. Don’t let those inhibit you. Break old patterns and start adjusting them bit by bit. Next thing you know, it’ll be second nature!
~”mistakes are resources” – Every time you make a mistake, it’s a chance to learn. Failure is in the eye of the beholder. Take each stumble as a lesson so you don’t run into the same issue again. Successful entrepreneurs especially know this; they’ve all failed and learned!
~”model after someone successful” – Find someone (or “someones”) doing what you want to accomplish and find a formula of their actions that work for you. Take what they do best, what has led them to success, and learn from it.
~”Mother Nature has equipped you with everything you need” – You just need to harness that natural talent!
Amy Lukken, Director of Market Research and Educational Learning
And today’s speaker was Ms. Amy Lukken from Interface, with similar wisdom:
~People tend to focus on the negative, like when you get a report card with As and Bs and one D. All parents will immediately see the D and question it. We’re always working to improve our weaknesses (but what about our strengths?). Around the time we’re 3-9, our natural talents start to emerge. We can and should take those and find ways to develop them and apply them to future jobs.
~She showed us a t-shirt that said: Failure is NOT an option. Good idea, but the most prominent words were “failure” and “not.” Walking around seeing them all day doesn’t give the right impression. (As I like to say, double negative wording is detrimental to the positive meaning they hide. Just word things positively!)
~Discover your passion and aim for that. You shouldn’t get stuck in a job you hate just because it is stable, pays well, etc. Oftentimes there are ways to incorporate what you’re good at and your passions into many types of roles. (Take me, for example – I’m good at proofreading, so I could be an editor in many organizations.)
Now I’ll take their words, trying to remember it all as I move forward.
It frustrates me when people don’t do anything because they think it won’t matter.
“Oh, it’s just a drop of water in the ocean, a grain of sand on the beach, a star in the night sky. Without that drop, the ocean is still as expansive; without that grain, the beach is still as solid; without that star, the night sky is still as bright. You’ll never miss it.”
Everything has an origin point. Don't underestimate just one little thing. photo credit: shannonstanley.wordpress.com
But you know what? It does matter! That one drop creates ripples, affecting its neighbors that then affect their neighbors until a wave builds up. Besides, actions reflect a mentality, so not making one small change here can lead to not making another small change there. If you work incrementally, the next thing you know, you’ve made a huge change. It takes time and patience to see results that are truly worthy of gaining, as well as persistence.
Every time you leave the water running, don’t turn off the lights, don’t donate your time or money, and otherwise deem things too much effort and not enough tangible reward, you are increasing the vicious cycle of inaction and indifference. Aggregated, each little action adds up to become a trend, a movement. And thus, nobody should ever give up from the get-go, thinking, “Well it won’t really matter that much overall.” It can and it will, if you stick to it, then start to affect the people in your life too. Eventually, you’ll have something on a scale you never imagined, because the power of compounding has taken effect and created something much larger than just you.
And so, I’m going to start increasing the number of registered bone marrow donors (particularly ones of Asian descent), one person at a time until we get a massive database. It’s pathetic that there’s only 7% of Asian Americans on the US who are currently available to donate when there are thousands of people in need. I’ve already gotten some friends to enter themselves into the registry and slowly started to educate them not only on the need, but the misconception that it is a painful procedure to extract the marrow. What are you waiting for? Go register yourself now! And also go learn more about one young lady who is fighting the battle against leukemia right now.
I’m also taking environmentalism one step at a time, constantly weeding out the things and habits in my life that are unsustainable, replacing them with more globally-friendly alternatives.
Be the impetus for change. Start something. Then keep working hard as the effects ripple further and faster. This goes for anything you care about, from our deteriorating environment to our broken education system to poverty to deadly diseases. Everything has got to start somewhere!
The past two nights, I’ve been playing out my fears subconsciously in my dreams. Two nights ago, I had a nightmare that I cheated on Panda by kissing another guy, who then tried to get me to leave Panda. I told him that I had made a mistake and I wasn’t going to be with him, but I was horrified by what I had done. I woke up vaguely remembering what I had dreamed and feeling miserable, but relieved that it wasn’t real.
Then last night I dreamed that Philosopher and I were in a parking garage. For some reason he had gone up to the second level and came back down telling me I had been rejected. Confused, we went upstairs where a blue car resembling the one that my parents had owned many years ago was parked with a letter under the windshield wiper and a huge playing card (a jack) on the ground in front of it. The card was something like three feet tall by two feet wide and seemed to be a play on the word “jacked” because that was certainly a way to describe the way I felt. The letter was a rejection one from the job I had applied to. I was absolutely devastated when I woke up in the split second before I realized it was just another nightmare.
I suppose I have been more stressed than I realized and now I’m being bombarded by the things I dread most. I just hope that both have “happened” already so they won’t in reality. After all, I never want to do anything to hurt Panda and I REALLY want that job. So let’s just hope that both those events turn out the way I want them to!
I’m inching my way closer and closer to a potential job offer! After passing first-round interviews, I had a second interview and am now a finalist for the position I want so much. I said before it’s not exactly my dream job, but what I meant is it isn’t my complete life goal, but for a first job, it pretty much would be the ultimate job for me to attain. It not only allows me to stay close to my alma mater (one of my four stipulations), it would be a great way for me to jump-start a career in environmentalism.
I just sent out my official reference list, complete with a little blurb for each person to describe the (skill) areas they know me best in. Prior to that, I e-mailed my references to confirm their willingness to speak on behalf of my qualifications, work ethic, and performance (and perhaps my personality as well). I also did much of the work for them, coming up with some examples of what I did while working for them and reminding them of my strengths. I hope all goes well and that the hiring manager checks all the references to get the best all-around picture! I’ve also prompted my boss who’s meeting with two of the people on the interviewing team sometime this week. She agreed to help put in a good word for me, so I gave her a refresher course on what I’ve done.
Now I’ve pretty much taken every step I can to increase my attractiveness as a candidate. It seems there is not too much else I can do beyond waiting for this week to (hopefully) fly by! In the mean time, I will enjoy the last couple of days I have with Philosopher before he heads back to England.
Well, today is Blog Action Day and thousands of blogs are writing about climate change! When I get a chance, I’ll go check out what they’ve all written, but for myself, it’s all about what I can do as an individual. Certainly it’s not much on the grand scheme, but individual actions add up and I’m hoping that down the line I can start an eco-consulting firm to address this very issue and get people to change their behavior in positive ways. With enough people making enough effort, we can make a powerful impact. That’s my dream for the future.
As for now, I decided to explore the ways I’ve greened my life and what I can do to continue along that path. I’ve made a lot of small changes to my life over the years to get to this point and I plan on continuing steadily for the rest of my life. So some ways that I’ve already greened my life are…
~ using reusable tote bags and saving all plastic bags I do get for other purposes
~ composting (I’d like to start a worm compost one day)
~ recycling (too bad so many things aren’t recyclable!)
~ unplugging everything when not in use
~ changing out light bulbs (some of the smaller ones are still traditional bulbs… are they going to make smaller energy-efficient bulbs?)
~ eating little red meat (I don’t eat much meat in general, especially beef)
~ printing only when absolutely necessary (which is hardly ever)
~ using a green service provider to power my website
In the next couple of months, I plan on implementing some new ways of improving my own sustainability. Some options may have to wait until I’ve settled a little more and know where I’ll be living for the next couple of years (namely, planting my own fruits and vegetables to eat). Each change is a step towards progress and by the time I’m 30, I hope I can proudly claim a sustainable lifestyle.
~ plant fruits/vegetables to eat
~ buy more locally
~ change shower heads
~ filter water – no more bottles! – and continue using reusable bottles
~ get a hybrid car (and try to drive less)
~ walk/bike/skate more (it’s good for your health, after all!)
~ phase out commercialized cleaning solutions for more old school ones (like using baking soda and vinegar, or those squash-looking loofahs)
~ buy an energy-efficient and environmentally friendly laptop
I’m sure there’s a lot more I can do, but this is a start! I’ll keep working on my list over the years as solutions are developed and I discover more ways that I can change my ways to leave a smaller carbon footprint in this world. I’ve begun to educate and influence those around me as well, and I intend on doing that in a greater scale further into my career! Someday I’d like to see everyone in my city living this way and a good portion of the country as well. I don’t know if I’ll live to see the world change like that, but that would certainly be amazing.
Don't make me go there yet! Let me do my interview first, please. photo credit: sanfernandovalleylawyers.com
Today I got an e-mail that had me bouncing off the walls: an invitation to schedule an interview for a job I really want! It was thrilling to see it sitting there in my inbox, waiting patiently for me to open it and arrange to meet with the hiring manager for the position. I eagerly replied with a preferred time and she confirmed not long after. Suddenly, I remembered that I’m on call for jury duty this week! Frantically, I began to compose an e-mail back, bringing up the topic. I came up with as many alternatives as I could and sent it back, hoping she can be flexible with her time. Now I’m waiting here and haven’t received a response, so I anticipate she has gone to bed and I won’t know until tomorrow.
In the mean time, I’m reviewing the application information and compiling a list of my qualifications for each of their requirements. I’ll go over their website, my cover letter, and interview advice articles over the next two days as I prepare for this all-important interview. I e-mailed my parents, happily sharing the news with them and called up my mom when she was free to talk. Tomorrow I’ll be chatting with my dad, discussing possible questions I should be ready for and anything else his wisdom has to offer. After all, he’s often been in both the hiring and applying positions and can impart a lot of useful knowledge and insight.
LEED certified! Who wouldn't want to work in a building so green? photo credit: smithgroup.com
I’m also going to e-mail a former boss, who I just went to visit days ago, and see what she has to say. It’ll be nice to share the good news with her, after I gushed about the position and how much I wanted it. Besides, she works for UCLA, so maybe she’ll have some pertinent pointers to share with me. Now let’s hope I can make it to the final step and get hired! I’d be absolutely elated because this job fulfills the requirements I had outlined before. Though I said it’s not exactly my dream job (which would to be an eco-consultant, I think), it is my favorite candidate for being my first career job.
When I was talking to my mom, I was concerned that they weren’t interviewing on Friday because they were going to choose then and then rush someone into the position by Monday. That would make things difficult if I had jury duty and the manager couldn’t stay after work to interview me. My mom assured me that no company would ever be so crazy-rushed to hire someone in such a short time frame, so there must be leeway for me to interview at a later time if I must. If I get called in to serve my civic duties on Thursday, I certainly hope she’s right. I would love to get this position!
Gosh I’m nervous. I haven’t wanted something so much since Panda.
photo credit: markterrybooks.com
At moments, my mind is clouded by a foggy haze. Thoughts no longer come in lucidly and I can just imagine the transmissions in my brain slowing down. It’s hard to focus when an invisible weight sets foot on your cranium and won’t dissolve, no matter how you try. In fact, it’s almost like corn starch in water or a Chinese finger trap, where the harder you try, the more resistant it gets. So I’ve given up fighting against the current and decided that it’s time to let my weary mind rest for the night. I have no clue what has brought on this mental murkiness, but along with it I feel a sense of increased agitation and restlessness.
Snippets of thoughts run through my head – things to remember, things to do, things to… wait, what was I thinking again? A train of thought is lost just as easily as another takes its place and my mind jumps around lethargically in a way completely unlike the normal stream of thoughts that has me working at a quick pace. I remember websites I meant to visit and read, but I’ve no patience to go through the words. My left eye feels more strained than my right and that irks me. I remember moments that I was harsh or irresponsible towards Panda and I get a pang of guilt.
Too many choices lay in my path and I can’t seem to rationalize my decisions. Everything is a good path, so how do I choose just one? I want to go to all these events, but I don’t have the time and shouldn’t use the resources to. I’ve been craving ice cream all night long and never got around to getting some. I’ve wasted way too much time agonizing over when I’ll gain access to Google Wave, then researching Google Voice and MetroPCS instead. Why? Because I’m curious and wanted to learn about them. But I feel at a standstill, unable to get what I want though I know what it is that I’d love so much. A lot of that has to do with my job search.
I wouldn’t say I’ve found a dream job, but I’ve found one that fits my main specifications and sounds wonderful:
1. with UCLA
2. environment-related
3. decent pay with benefits
4. small work environment
But I haven’t heard back and it’s frustrating because I hate the whole job hunting process and I’d like to just get a job and settle a bit. Much as I enjoy what I’m doing now, there’s huge pressure from my parents to find a job. I don’t think they want anything else from me now, even if I win an award or get to do something prestigious.
I'd like some tranquility and a sense of accomplishment right about now. photo credit: healthyoga.com
My body feels out of sync and I’m getting more conscious of my unevenness. I haven’t had a proper workout for ages because I’ve been telling myself that I’ll start up a routine once I get a job. See, even I’m placing these restrictions on myself. I just want to land that job, get an apartment, get that new car, and begin a routine. Strange. I’m not one for routines and doing the same thing over and over again. But at the same time, I’d like a little more pattern in my life. Living week to week is not sustainable. So many things hinge on settling (and having money): starting to attend yoga classes, joining a massage clinic, picking up more hobbies, getting more creative with cooking, hitting up more restaurants, going to football/basketball games, getting alumni membership in Alpha Kappa Psi, reading books again… I’m putting off everything requiring money or a steady time commitment. After all, I don’t want to start something just to have to change when I do start working full-time.
