I never really paid attention much, but it seems that my dedication is unusually strong.

One thing I’ve noticed lately is that a lot of blogs fall to the wayside, with people starting off hopeful and then posts end up dwindling to nothing.  The same thing goes for journals.  For years I’ve been hearing from friends and others I meet that they tried to keep one too, but it never really got anywhere.  Meanwhile, I kept daily journal for 13 years, accumulating around 50 volumes of journals before I stopped (I blame meeting Panda :-P).  I’ve still got notes for my journal from when I left off and I’ve been considering picking it up again.  However, there’s always the battle of “is it worth the time?” or “does this matter enough to me to be recorded?”  After all, the time I spend writing is time I’m not spending doing other fun and interesting things worth writing about.

What is it about writing blogs or journals that makes nearly everyone want to do it at some point?  I guess there’s a certain human quality that craves documentation and future historical value.  There are memories that we’d like to have to look back on.  On the other hand, it could really be a more technical issue, with those who want to practice their writing and develop it over the years.  Certainly lack of consistent writing will have a detrimental effect on the quality of your pieces, especially years down the road.  So professional or not, a blog or journal can at least force you to keep up your writing skills, to some degree.

I’ve also wondered what it is about me that makes me continue writing when others would have stopped.  Why do so many people want to write regularly, but don’t?  Perhaps it is because I am stubborn.  Perhaps it is because I got started at a young age (10).  Perhaps it is because my sentimentalism drives me to keep on going so I’ll have a lot to look back on.  I’m not quite sure what it is exactly, but many factors have urged me on over the years, as I continuously questioned the value of writing so much.  I’ve spent countless hours huddled with the latest journal design I was using, accompanied by a lovely stash of colored pens that I wrote with.  Now I’m spending countless hours typing away my thoughts, exploring some of the things that have been on my mind.  It certainly is a great outlet, preserved for all posterity.

Ultimately, I guess it just comes down to that fact that I want to keep going.  Whatever the reasons for wanting may have changed over the years as my style and even medium of writing transitioned, but that desire has not faded.  And so, I will keep on writing and wondering what this is all about, if only because I am dedicated to this part of my life.