I debated writing something for the 25th anniversary of 9/11, but I wanted to quietly contemplate on my own instead. One of these days, I might reflect and write about it, but for now…

Today was the first day I realized I woke and felt at peace. It was a nice feeling and realization and I hope it means I’ve turned a corner. My energy levels are still not up to par and I often am tired (but not so much exhausted at least) and/or need nap(s).

We had all sorts of weather advisories early this month, including one day with a heat advisory, high surf advisory, flooding advisory, AND extreme heat warning, so I ended up staying at home a little more, to avoid the heat. We had the aftereffects of Hurricane Marie batter our shoreline and many beaches were washed away, leaving the rocks underneath. Aliso Beach was one of the most damaged, with parts of the sidewalk falling apart, palm trees coming down, and flooding on the parking lot that have it completely shut for the time being. Apparently in 2014, another Hurricane Marie did similar damage, though not quite as extreme as this time. We are supposed to have El Niño this winter, which I read brings swells from the north (as opposed to these waves from the south), and it might actually help repair some of the sand we lost. We shall see! This is the first year that I’ve gone to the beach consistently and started to notice these things.

I complain about a heat wave here, but really it was only in the high 90’s. However, it was unusually humid for our area, so of course it felt much hotter. I usually get a cool ocean breeze and I only have to open my windows for natural A/C, but this time I had to turn on my A/C for the first time I think in 3 years. It was so hot that the insects were barely moving! I had a dragonfly rest in the shade of my house for so long that I thought it might have died. Then there was a katydid that did a very slow crawl across my window and I got to watch it breathe through the glass! The spiders have been out in force as well, with webs even spanning the path to my gate. Many of them seem to have caught a bee to eat, never seen that before. Worst of all, the ants have invited themselves inside to drink my cat’s water and crawl into the space behind the dishwasher. I really try to avoid killing them, so I just try to remove the source of their interest, but they keep finding something new. Alas, I’m about ready to apply more dire methods.

Since my last update, I got around to:

My sense of time is still stretching in the short-term, every 2-3 days feels like a week, but the longer scale time doesn’t feel quite so long ago. I do have trouble remembering when I did what, which is also warping my sense of time. This past weekend, I had a delightful day with my parents and cousin, where we had lunch and then hung out chatting until dinner and beyond. It was a total of about 9 hours where I did not feel rushed or impatient and simply enjoyed their company. I’m not normally social, but I do appreciate some time with loved ones (so long as I still get my alone time).

Liminal check-in (these are the milestones I set that would help me gauge how my body is recovering):

Milestone	Status	Date Achieved
wake up with energy	nearly there, not energetic but neutral at least	N/A
sleep in to 8am or later	managed 4 days in a row, but waking at 7 again, so it’s not yet stable	Aug 31 (day 10)
a week with no headache	headaches every third day or so, and they don’t last as long	N/A
no need to nap for a week	napping about 2-3 days a week	N/A
skin inflammation resolves	less now, but still present	N/A
sores gone	fading, not fully gone	N/A
no more nightmares for at least 10 days	happening every 2-3 days, but slowly turning more into dreams	N/A

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