Posts Tagged ‘experiences’

For the sake of it

laelene Posted in general blog,Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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photo credit: puttputtproductions.com

photo credit: puttputtproductions.com

I was born in the Year of the Ox and the month of the Capricorn.  Both are known to be stubborn creatures, which is something that I’ve most definitely inherited, for better or for worse.  Many of the things I chose to do in my life have been out of pure stubbornness – first to be able to say that I did it and second just to be different.  Of course, the more people try to get me to change my behavior, the more determined I get to stick to my principles, morals, and priorities.  I think I like the satisfaction of claiming that I don’t do this or that or that I have done something for this long.  Especially when it’s something most of the population would like to claim as well, I feel all the better about being able to stake my claim.

The three most prominent examples of this are what I will or will not ingest, my frequency of relocations and moves, and my persistence with my journal.  For each, though it may not always make sense for me to stick to my guns so strictly, I do so to preserve the idea that it’s always been that way.  I don’t like to compromise in any of these areas and it’s quite rare for me to do so, though I’ve been working on that lately, since some of what I do is truly unfounded or limiting.  At the same time, certain aspects I don’t plan on ever changing and that can be seen as a good or bad thing.  Ok, let me clarify what I mean by each of these examples then.

Lychee flavor!

Lychee flavor!

First off are my peculiar food and drink preferences.  As many know, I do not drink alcohol, coffee, or energy drinks.  I also refuse to eat rubbery things like calamari, squid, and other such odd creatures.  I stay away from burgers, steak, lobster, and caviar.  I am especially strict with alcohol, also avoiding food cooked in it, chocolates with liqueur, and the like.  Even fermented food is a big no-no in my books, though some of these things have been unavoidably tasted at least once.  The more people try to pressure me to drink, the more resistant I am, even if it’s just a taste or small portion of wine.  I often get the “you know that it can actually be good for you, right?” and pay no heed – the costs far outweigh the benefits in my eyes.  I do, however, like to collect a few mini bottles here and there because they’re rather cute (plus, why would you ever drink it?  They’re too pretty!).

However, last year I did become curious and exasperated enough to try some beer (at age 22) and it was just as nasty as I thought it’d be, plus some.  So that experience only solidified my resolve to avoid alcohol.  I’m sure people will now focus on how I didn’t try wine or something lighter, fruitier, or whatever.  Perhaps one day I will sip some wine just to get them to leave me alone, but as of now I’ll just ignore their pleads that it can be good for my health.  In fact, I cherish an article I read recently about how the link that people draw between moderate drinking and good health may not be a causal effect, but actually be discounting many other possible factors that affect people’s drinking.  Even if there was solid proof, I’m not about to just follow suit.  I can eat blueberries and pomegranates for antioxidants and have fish oil and avocados for cardiovascular health.  No alcohol needed.

I avoid coffee and energy drinks for the caffeine, which I don’t want or need, plus coffee smells disgusting to me.  I like to do things naturally and without artificial aids whenever possible, so if I’m tired I take a nap.  If I’m pulling an all-nighter, I drink lots of water or tea.  I don’t need these extreme stimulants to affect my body in strange ways.

As for rubbery things, I’m not a fan of having to overwork my jaw or swallow large chunks of food.  The texture doesn’t appeal to me, so I stick to crab, shrimp, and scallops, which is seafood that I do like to eat.  This is not for health reasons, so I did try these “dong dong” shells in Singapore, since it’s a local thing.  Now, I’m not quite sure why I don’t like burgers – I think it stems from a gross one I saw in the cafeteria in my childhood.  I’ve stayed away ever since, though I have broken that to have about five in the past 15 years.

photo credit: artvoice.com

This doesn’t look appetizing to me at all. photo credit: artvoice.com

Steak is just too thick for me and I hate how it usually comes at least somewhat pink.  I don’t really like meat that much, unless it’s very thinly sliced.  Lobster is something my mom and I have disagreed on for ages – she says I ate it as a kid and I refuse to believe that.  The only time I recall having it was in a dip, where the chunks were minimal.  I’m not interested in ever eating a full one.  And caviar has the same problem that rubbery things have in that I don’t like the texture.  I also stubbornly don’t like food that is high class and expensive (though it’s a coincidence that my taste buds prefer cheaper foods).

Secondly, I am persistent in my desire to move around because that’s how my life has always been.  I like being able to say I’ve never lived in the same city for more than 3 and 1/2 years consecutively.  I like having so many old homes and schools and jobs that I have to keep a list or else I’d forget.  I’m not the type of person to stay put and I enjoy that.  My friends are never really too surprised to hear of my escapades because I’m on the go far more than they usually are.  If for that reason alone, I want to keep moving around and not settle quite yet.  Of course, it also has to do with just being used to that lifestyle.

My most recent journal.

My most recent journal.

Finally, how many people can say they have kept a journal for 14 years?  I want to be able to, but I’m at 13 now and a year behind in catching up on entries.  Most people I tell say they tried to keep a journal, but that only lasted a week, a month, a year… I’ve yet to meet someone who’s managed for as long as I have.  And if only for the sake of being able to say that I have, I want to continue with it, whether or not it may be worth my while.  Ultimately I think it’ll be a great thing to draw from later on if I decide to write an autobiography (or if people want to look back on my life, though it’d certainly be a bit tedious – I’m already reaching 50 volumes and that’s A LOT of reading).

So you see, much of my motivations for these areas is because of my stubbornness to continue to do it like I always have (or at least since my childhood).  Generally, people respect my choices and think it’s good that I don’t drink and don’t rely on coffee or energy drinks for a boost.  They also think it’s crazy that I move so frequently, but respect my ability to do that as well.  And of course, everyone wishes they were able to keep the journal they always meant to have.  I like being the one who does.  The one who is able to stay away from alcohol, coffee, and energy drinks.  The one who doesn’t need or want to spend exorbitant amounts on steak, lobster, and caviar.  The one who has lived everywhere.  The one who has kept a journal for years.  The one who can, who has, and who will.

Serendipity

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Some may call it an accident, some may call it a mistake, but I call it serendipity.  With every supposed wrong turn we make, every situation that doesn’t go quite as we planned, there’s something else to be discovered and seen.  It seems that the “bad luck” I’ve had recently may have been unfortunate, but it has also provided the opportunity for some rich experiences.  Of course, there are lessons to be learned, but I don’t like to concern myself too much with getting things right.  Traveling is just about the one thing that I am ok not doing extensive research on before jumping in.  In fact, I’d be perfectly fine with not knowing my next destination or how long I’d be staying at the current one, if only I had the money to support that type of travel.

Spacious and comfy.

Spacious and comfy.


It all started when I was getting ready to check in for my flight to Kuala Lumpur.   I had inadvertently packed my passport in a purse that I had decided not to bring.  Thankfully, I discovered it soon enough to still catch a ride with Mizu and Zen.  It turns out that was actually fortunate, because I had booked the wrong flight (it was for the following day), so I would have been stranded there or been forced to pay SGD 60 to change to that flight, if they had space.  Instead, I got a luxury bus ticket for SGD 38, got treated to gelato and waffles, had a huge seat and personal TV, got a chance to enjoy the landscape, and even got dropped off at a location very close to my hostel (saved me a trip from the airport!).  I had wanted to take a bus originally, but what I fould was more expensive than flying, which is why I had chosen to buy an air ticket.  But in the end, I still got what I had wanted to do.

The next hiccup was a small one, where I nearly went to the wrong airport to board my flight to Phuket.  It was caught early on in the day, so I got to my boarding gate with plenty of time to spare, but even if I had gone to the wrong place, I could have found a way to get there on time anyway.  Upon arrival in Phuket, the airport bus had stopped running for the night, so I took a shared airport “limousine” and we stopped at a travel agent’s office so they could solicit us.  Though I didn’t book any tours, I did find out about one that I was interested in, which I probably wouldn’t have known about otherwise.  I plan on taking such a tour in the next day or two.

The night view of Phuket Town.

The night view of Phuket Town.


Now in Phuket there are many beaches, most of which are a good 30 minute drive from Phuket Town.  My first day there, I decided to go over to Patong Beach, which is the most tourist-concentrated one.  I had booked a spa appointment for the afternoon and enjoyed some wonderful relaxation treatment (aromatherapy sauna, hot stone massage, and facial!) before heading to the beach.  I had a lovely time digging up clams and those sand bugs that burrow in the sand with amazing speed.  Unfortunately, I had a bit too much fun and by 7:15 I was trying to find a ride back to no avail.  The bus stopped running at 6:30 and the tut tuts quoted me at THB 500!  So I walked along the street, trying to find a better way and ended up asking a hotel security guard and his friend for help.  They flagged down a family on a motobike and arranged to have them drop me off for THB 200.  The man dropped off his wife and baby and took me over the hills back to Phuket Town.  On the way he stopped for gas (or whatever it is) and I was greatly amused when they took a huge bottle of what looked like cherry syrup or grenadine and poured it into his tank.  What interesting fuel!  When we got to the hostel and I paid him, he then offered to take me for a spin around town.  I decided to accept his offer and later he insisted on showing me Phuket Town from a viewpoint.  There was a nice park at the top of a summit and a crowd of people sat on the small wall erected to prevent people from tumbling down.

It almost makes me want to try it.

Would you have guessed this is fuel?


Learning my lesson, I checked with the bus driver the next day to make sure I didn’t miss the last bus (which was due at 4) and went to another beach, Nai Harn.  I had managed to find a larger clam and even a pointy-shelled sea snail before it started to rain.  So by 3:20, I was standing under some trees at the bus stop, waiting for the bus to arrive.  When it stopped raining, I ventured back towards the beach to get some more water for my new pets and an expat approached me, offering to take me back.  Apparently he had seen the guys at the coffee shop eyeing me and he didn’t feel it was safe for me.  I just needed the bus to come and all would be fine.  He insisted on taking me because he was bored out of his mind and needed something to do, so I decided to go with it.  I got the extra water I wanted and he took me to his place to exchange the motobike for a truck.  We had a nice chat and I got a comfortable ride back, complete with a bucket to keep my pets in so I wouldn’t have to hold them the whole way.

So, it turned out that each transportation problem I came across became a new adventure, often with nice people helping me out.  I believe that people are mostly kind and genuine and certainly not psychokillers or kidnappers, but I still keep a wary eye out.  Everybody I’ve sized up so far seemed like a punch to the face and a kick to the groin would be enough to take them down.  I’ve watched out for roads to make sure we were going the right way and noted places that we passed that looked safe enough to find help at, if I had to run away.  With those precautions, then it’s just luck on who I choose to trust.  People may be concerned about a girl traveling on her own, but as my expat driver told me, I seem very confident.  I walk with a purposeful and powerful stride, I ignore most of the people hollering at me, and I act like I know what I’m doing whether or not I actually do.  Nobody’s going to see me as an easy target.  I’ve come across a lot of helpful people who have saved me a lot of hassle (and money).  I call that serendipity.  🙂

Hostel LA

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The first hostel I stayed at was cozy and cute, run by a man named Hazdy and his friends/relatives. He knew the names of each and every person staying with him, greeting us by name and remembering what we had planned for the day so he could ask how it went. Now that’s some personalized service! He lived right there in the hostel too, so he was always around. I went to him whenever I had a question, ranging from how to get places to where to eat. I trusted his knowledge and judgment and thus spent less time online searching for those answers. He even introduced me to other hostelers when I returned from my day if they were sitting in the “lobby” area.

Now I am at a hostel that looks like it is run by a couple who also live on the premises. Last night they didn’t have the accommodation type I reserved, so today they gave me free breakfast. It was tasty and filling, with toast, eggs, fresh fruit, and tea. The living room is stacked with DVDs and there are couches, oversized pillows, and these special-made recliners situated throughout the common areas. It’s a comfortable place to stay and extremely clean too. There’s even a quaint garden area in the back and the entire place has a very open plan, with places where people on the second floor can look down to see parts of the first floor.

DSC03263

From sports...

The first hostel experience got me thinking about how fun it could be to run a hostel. I was thinking that if I were to open one, it would be in Westwood. I’d convert one of those little homes around Gayley and Weyburn so food would be right across the street, bus stops would be nearby (especially the airport shuttle), and UCLA would be but a 15 minute walk. I’d go around the hot spots in LA to understand the best times to visit seasonally and even the optimal time of day, then I’d go searching for all the small things that wouldn’t appear in a tour guide. I’d set up a shuttle service to get people to some of the main areas in town (or at least to some reliable public transportation). I’d hire a friendly staff consisting of receptionists, housekeepers, a cook, and drivers.

DSC03952

...to entertainment.

I would name this little place Hostella/Hostela/HosteLA, for hostel LA and keep it extremely clean. I’d have an array of TV channels, DVDs, and books for display as well as personal enjoyment. If there’s a particular show or novel that someone likes, they can opt to trade it for something my library doesn’t have. I’d provide free wireless DSL or something decently fast and at least two computer stations, complete with scanner and printer. I’d keep a collection of plug converters for those who don’t have them. I’d have some nice wardrobes for people to keep their clothes and some valuables locked away while they’re out. The front desk would be open 24/7, in case some people get stranded on their way in and show up at odd times.

DSC04016

And of course a variety of great cuisine!

Ah, what a nice little fantasy I’ve conjured up! It would be a great chance for me to both share more of this city I’ve grown to love and explore it even further in my quest to provide the best inside tips. For those night owls, I’d even take them out to K-town for some BCD whenever I’m up and craving it. They’d get free reign on the kitchen so long as they cleaned up after themselves and I’d provide assistance for those who go grocery shop and buy just a bit too much for their legs and arms to handle. I’d also love to share with them the random things that they may not come across in typical tours, like the roving Kogi trucks that sell Korean food wherever they stop. If they want a nice beach to relax at, I’d tell them about my favorite quiet one in Malibu, where dolphins like to play.

Some things are more hidden away.

Some things are more hidden away.

I have so many ideas brewing that I wish this was possible! Unfortunately, the US in general is not a very backpacker-friendly place and LA is especially so. Unless they get a car, they really can’t appreciate all that the city has to offer (and even with a car, parking would be such a pain). Granted, there are still a fair share of hostels in the city, though they’re all in Hollywood or Santa Monica. The advantage of Westwood would be the access to college life, from visiting the campus itself to seeing what frat parties are all about. This dream would also be a huge investment to begin with, what with getting the place and then converting it to the appropriate layout. It would be so cool though – meeting travelers when I’m not traveling and showing them the best of Los Angeles.

What would you share about your town?

Solo

laelene Posted in general blog,Tags: , , ,
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“You travel alone?” they ask.

I hesitate, sizing each one up before slowly nodding my head in confirmation.

“Yes,” I murmur.

“Oh, you not scared? So brave!” they exclaim.

It’s a common conversation that I have with the locals on my travels.  It seems that every friendly soul who strikes up a conversation with me will ask if I’m alone and finds it admirable that I am alone.  I guess that’s fair enough – I’ve yet to see another girl traveling alone.  We really are few and far between, especially in Asia.  But to me, this type of travel is not so abnormal, so it’s just vacationing as usual.

Sometimes I want to ask these people, “Should I be scared?”  After all, that’s what they’re implying.  Nevertheless, I am not scared and see no real reason to be.  Most people ignore me and those who do talk to me are just curious about where I came from.  They’re all nice enough, though I still keep my guard up.  There are those moments when someone walks by too close for comfort and I find myself clutching my purse a little tighter to my chest, but generally I’m not worried.

I’m always careful not to flaunt my wallet or other valuables (most of which I didn’t even bring in the first place).  I carry as little as I can, typically just a small purse and a water bottle.  I keep my eye out for suspicious movements and never walk too close to other people or the road.  I keep my money, cards, and ID in at least two places so I’ll still have half if the others go missing.  I maintain a neutral expression on my face so nobody thinks of me as threatening or too vulnerable.

So, through a combination of precautionary steps and general street smarts (not to mention locals who usually aren’t a threat), I haven’t run into any problems yet, nor do I anticipate on it.

My other half isn’t here

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For some reason whenever I travel, there will inevitably be that person who asks me, “Do you have a boyfriend?”  Well, actually, yes, I do.  Besides, it’s not as if I’d ever stay and get involved with any guy I meet on my trips, even if I was still single.  What motivates these people to ask, despite knowing that I’m a traveler who’s just passing by for a few days?  It’s certainly a far-fetched scenario that I’d be smitten suddenly and be convinced to stay longer, yet they still ask as if they have a chance.  It’s an interesting phenomenon; I wonder why people are like that.  I mean, deep down they must know it’s a silly idea, right?

Today a lady asked for this guy when I was waiting for the bus to arrive.  I find it amusing how people always want to match make, whether or not the pairing is actually feasible.  This happened a lot when I was working in Whole Foods around LA a few summers back.  Strangely enough, all the sushi men seemed to be Chinese and they were all eager to match me with their sons, grandsons, or nephews (especially when they found I speak Mandarin).  At least they had a sliver of a chance, since I’d actually be around the area for more than a few days.  Still, it strikes me as odd that the thought is even entertained when they’d have no way of contacting me (and please, I wouldn’t give my info out for some guy I’ve never met).  I guess to some extent we all need to live on hopes, dreams, and the occasional fantasy.

Today’s lady was very surprised to see me traveling alone if I had a boyfriend.  Are we supposed to be glued together?  Am I not allowed to travel if I’m not with him?  Well, you know, sometimes people are busy and can’t always travel together.  Nice as it would be to have him here now, unfortunately it is not possible.  I was almost tempted to say, “I’m sorry, my other half isn’t here now, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be my own person.”  That’s the impression that I got – that somehow I wasn’t allowed to be my own person without my boyfriend in tow.  Well, that’s certainly not the case for me!  And so it goes, just me striking it out on my own for now.

A series of “oops” moments

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DSC05333Wow, what an eventful day.  It started off quite well, with calls from Mizu announcing a pleasant surprise: I would get company on my way to the airport and even be given a ride!  That meant that I could sleep in a little and enjoy some extra rest.  By and by it came time to leave, so I took my stuff downstairs and hopped in the car.  We got to the airport with plenty of time to spare and ate some lunch, casually chatting until it was time to check in.  Mizu and Zen then went on their way and I prepared my documents for the counter.

And thus began the adventure.  I went to get my passport out of my purse only to find it missing.  I checked all the compartments and tore apart my suitcase checking for it.  Pretty soon, I realized that I left it in the other purse I had been packing for the trip, which I had decided to leave behind because it was too big for my needs.  Dismayed, I called up Mizu and wailed the news to him.  He and Zen decided it would be best for them to pick me up and go get it, so I headed out to meet them along the way.

In the car, I called up Typea to check if anyone was at home to let me in.  Unfortunately, they had all gone out.  He gave me the numbers of his family members to call up and I went through each one, finally reaching his father.  We arranged for him to rush back to meet me.  While waiting, I called up the airline to ask about changing flights only to discover… I booked a flight for tomorrow.  -___-  As Mizu howled with laughter.  He was loving my newfound inner ditz!  Baffled at my own airheadedness, I considered my options and decided to opt for the bus option.

DSC05338Mizu kindly drove me to the bus departure and I got myself a ticket on a nice luxury vehicle.  We had some time before its departure, so I exchanged some money and then got some dessert to snack on.  Soon enough, it was time to board the bus and Mizu sent me on my way.  I settled in to the large comfy seat and watched the landscape whizz by as we headed off.  The rest of the trip was scattered with movie-watching and naps on and off, briefly interrupted twice to get off and go through immigration and customs.  It was very comfortable save for the cold air blasting overhead, which left me shivering towards the end of the trip.

We arrived at my stop unexpectedly and I rushed off, hoping it wasn’t too hard to get to the hostel.  Thankfully, it was an easy trip away and soon enough, I was settling in and meeting the others in my room.  I reported in to both my mother and Starfish as soon as I could get online so they’d know I made it to my first destination.  I then spent some time talking about travels with my roommates and then went to grab some dinner next door.  It’s far too late and I’m far too tired to do much else, so I just ate and typed the rest of the night away, occasionally chatting with some of the guys who work at the hostel.

Mentality vs behavior

laelene Posted in general blog,Tags: , , ,
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[just a short post as I get ready for a busy couple of weeks]

Today I met with a guy who came off as a huge cynic, or at least someone who doesn’t appreciate the world for what it is, but is dissatisfied with much of it.  It was a very interesting chat to hear about his point of view and how he sees himself as an optimist.  To him, the world could be so much better, but it isn’t, which is why he claims he’s an optimist.  However, I see that more as a harsh critic.  After all, he never provided any solutions or ideas for how to make things better then.  Instead, he dissed what he didn’t like and spoke eagerly about what he did (New Yorkers’ no-nonsense way of life).

I was put off by his negativity at first, but found it interesting to hear his view on things.  To some extent, he brought out the critic in me and I told him some of the things that bothered me.  Ultimately though, I’m a positive person and I don’t go around sullying everyone’s moods.  I can see why he considers himself an optimist, but I don’t think he is.  a true optimist would think we can do so much more and come up with ways to do it because he’d believe in our ability to accomplish such tasks.

At the same time, I felt intrigued to try to understand his complex character more.  It was refreshing to have someone challenge your way of thinking and your opinions so much though.  Another interesting thought that came up was how he doesn’t hide his gripes with the world and feels that people who see problems but are still happy are insincere.  I didn’t believe that and felt that though there are things I am not happy about, that doesn’t mean I’m going to spend my days pointing out all that bothers me.  I spent some time afterwards considering why I didn’t feel that incongruency was not a bad thing.  I’m still not quite sure how to put all these ideas into the right words, so I’ll get back to you when I have.

Surreal

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So many years in uniform.

So many years in uniform.


Have you ever looked back on your life and wondered, Did I really do that? Well, I have.  It’s the strangest thing, to have this sort of disconnect with my old life.  Perhaps it’s because things have changed so drastically with each stage and each move that it seems odd that I lived through that.  Whatever the case, sometimes I’ll be recounting things in my life and then I catch myself and marvel that that was really me, that was really my experience.  There are times when I am talking about my life, but it almost feels like I am telling the story of someone else’s life.  I think it also has to do with a feeling of being so fortunate – was I so lucky to actually be able to have done that?  In fact I was, but it’s hard to believe at times.

ATVing in Hawaii after the Australia trip!

ATVing in Hawaii after the Australia trip!


One of the main things I feel detached from these days is my childhood homes.  I’ll talk about how I was born in China and then lived in Pennsylvania, Kansas, Missouri, New York, and finally, California.  Then I’ll stop and think, how strange it was that I used to have half an acre of backyard to play with in Kansas.  Or that I went back to China for a year just for some cultural immersion.  With so many experiences that are so far-ranging, I guess it’s no wonder I feel like it was surreal at times.  Not many people get to go to Australia for two weeks or attend six boot camps or claim links to so many different places.  At times I marvel at the places I’ve had the chance to go to – it’s truly a blessing, though I’ll probably never have enough.  Travel is one of those things that doesn’t lose its charm as easily.  After all, there are just too many countries, too many cities, too many villages to go to!

My first prom dress was for this pageant.

My first prom dress was for this pageant.

Boot camps can be fun too!

Boot camps can be fun too!


Another aspect are the things I’ve been able to do.  They range from how I’ve kept a daily journal for thirteen years to working on a movie to visiting China annually in the summer.  Sometimes these things just seem too good to be true – did I really have that dedication?  Did I really rub elbows with Tom Waits?  Did my parents really spend that much money on me each year?  Even a basic part of my identity leaves me grateful – was I really fortunate enough that my parents were able to leave China?  It’s hard to live up to parents who are cream of the crop in intellect, but it’s a blessing what I’ve gotten because of that.  I can hardly imagine the disaster I’d be if I had grown up in China, being too masculine for my own good and not wanting to get stuck in a boring desk job.  Everything I’ve gotten to experience because of my American nationality is something that I may take for granted normally, but definitely not something I’ll ever forget was a gift to me from my hardworking parents.

At the same time, some of my own accomplishments amaze me too.  How did I balance 10 classes and two sports on three teams?  I was running around from 4 AM to 10 PM during my peak in high school, and then I had to do homework too.  Just thinking about that tires me out now, but I felt so good doing it then.  Similarly, the strenuous activities I did at the various boot camps I opted to attend make me wonder where all that energy came from (perhaps the MREs).  How were we able to march for so many miles and sleep so little?  How were we able to stay awake during classroom lectures (well, with the help of standing)?  When I stop to think of that it really takes to do that, it’s quite cool.

Smile, I'm on camera!

I’m on camera!


I’m sure everyone has something in their lives that if they stopped to really evaluate, they’d be proud of saying they did.  From my peers at UCLA who are attending a world class university to fellow ex-cadets who underwent the same boot camps, everyone makes themself worth something, somehow.  I think it doesn’t hurt to stop and consider how astonishing some of the things we’ve done are.  Maybe I’m just looking at everything through rosy glasses now, but I love thinking about all the cool things I’ve done.  Even the negative things I’ve experienced leave me in awe, wondering if I was really able to overcome that.  So to everyone who has done something extraordinary, whether it’s pay your way through college or excel at an art or sport, here’s to you!  May we all celebrate our accomplishments and learn to appreciate ourselves better.

Habits die hard

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Habits are these persistent still suckers that get ingrained in your very subconscious, affecting how you behave often in ways that you can’t help.  Since you’re so used to doing things that way, it takes a lot of conscious effort to change how you do it.  Even a lot of effort may not always be effective, though with time they can slowly take effect.  I’ve been having trouble with this for awhile now, with a very silly behavior.  You see, I’m a fidgety person – I like to move around.  Well, one of my fidgets is clapping the palm of one hand on the loose fist of the other hand.  Can you imagine what that looks like?  Turns out it’s considered an insult in Singaporean culture.  -___-  Hence, I will not take a picture to show you what it’s like.  I’ll leave that to your imagination.

I think this is a pretty safe universal sign.  photo credit: wpclipart.com

I think this is a pretty safe universal sign. photo credit: wpclipart.com

It seems that I like to do it for the very reason it is considered rude – there’s a nice echo and a sort of popping noise you can make by slapping your hands together like that.  I also snap my fingers and crack my knuckles because of this desire to make small movements and create a little bit of sound.  It breaks both the monotony of staying still and being quiet at the same time (which usually make me feel antsy).  Unfortunately for me, I was caught doing this by a very shocked Starfish, who immediately gasped at my gesture and frantically asked me what I was doing.  It was also brought up once when I was out with Mizu and some friends.  Throughout the rest of that night, I found myself catching myself right after doing it, then hiding my hands or trying to keep them from moving around so much.  But time and time again, my hands would find their way from under my legs or untangle themselves from an interlocked clasp to do that action again!  It really is difficult to adjust behavior.

This reminds me of my first few weeks in Singapore, when Mizu was overcoming a tendency to overuse “actually” with the help of Starfish and Marylin.  Whenever we caught him using it when it wasn’t necessary, someone would be there to clear their throat and ask, “Actually?”  Whether he was speaking to us, on the phone, or presenting, Starfish and Marylin kept a close ear on what he was saying.  With that sort of persistent watch kept over him, Mizu quickly learned to stop using it and it’s been a long time since he’s used that sentence more than once in a sentence.  (Because, actually, when do you actually need to actually use it so many times in a sentence, actually?)  😛

photo credit: weightlosswiththefabulousfatties.wordpress.com

photo credit: weightlosswiththefabulousfatties.wordpress.com

The good thing about behavior is that you don’t need to spend too much time thinking about doing it because it’s rather automatic.  However, for that same reason, it can come kick you in the butt because you may automatically do something that you don’t want to or shouldn’t.  It’s a trade-off between having more brain resources that can be directed to other thoughts and doing things that you may regret and will have trouble not doing.  According to popular knowledge and based on research, it takes 21 days to break a habit.  I think I’m nearing that mark…  Ultimately, it really is important to develop good habits at a young age, so you don’t have to work so hard to try to adjust your behavior when you’re older.

Take right now, for example.  I’ve made a lot of typos because I’m training myself to type with my left thumb and keep my right thumb off the spacebar.  Since I’m not used to that sort of coordination, I make the strangest typos without even realizing at times, because my brain sent the right signal, but my fingers didn’t execute properly.  Similarly, everyone has certain typos that they tend to make frequently (and often this doesn’t get corrected because of autocorrect) because of how they learned to type.  I know I always stumble on certain words and almost never get them right on the first try.  I remember I noticed that Katana used to do that a lot with “the,” which always came out as “teh.”  Such things are natural when you start typing quickly, but it’s still interesting to compare what I mess up on versus someone else.  Old dogs are slow to learn new tricks, aren’t they?

Simple pleasures

laelene Posted in general blog,Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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DSC05171It was a lovely day today and I had an equally lovely time going on an outing with Skim for the afternoon.  We met up at Bugis MRT and got on a bus that took us out to East Coast Park, where we were able to rent two bikes and take a nice ride.  A mere two minutes into our journey we nearly crashed into each other, as I tried to unsteadily pass my camera to her.  I never knew my right hand was so weak at maneuvering!  The opposite was for her, as she had trouble with her left hand, so there we were, a complete screaming disaster as we saved ourselves from near destruction.  I then switched to be on the left side and we managed to make the pass so she could take some pictures for me.  Why we couldn’t just stop our bikes like normal people I don’t know.  It’s far less exciting that way!

Doesn't that look like fun?

Doesn't that look like fun?

We went along the path and enjoyed cooling breezes from the ocean, quiet stretches in woodsy areas, and navigating around the sudden influx of people that would come upon us.  It was a lot of fun to be out in the sun and going through natural areas as we chatted about a variety of things, like our thoughts on careers and the type of work we do.  Along the way we stopped to watch some wakeboarders, parasailers, and windsailers having fun out on the water.  I don’t know if I’m fit enough to do that kind of thing, but I’d sure like to try someday!  First I want to learn how to surf though, which hopefully will be good for my sense of balance.  I’m really interested in water sports in general, so I hope I get around to trying all of them at some point.

DSC05184The one thing that wasn’t so enjoyable about the ride was when our butts started to get sore about two hours in.  I kept shifting around in an attempt to put weight on different areas, but once we stopped for a quick snack, we both felt the soreness creeping us.  At first walking was a little strange and I wondered if this is how it feels to get off a horse after a long journey.  I’ve only ever been on horses for brief times, about an hour or so, so I never got the bow legs that others have.  We were right by the ocean at that point, so we went down to the water so I could at least say I touched the ocean water here.  It’s a lesson from my trip to Australia that I’ve never forgotten – going in the water is something so simple, yet it’s something I didn’t do in the Gold Coast, so I’ll never repeat that mistake again.

This time, I took some jumping shots and it looked so fun that Skim decided she’d get her feet wet for the sake of that.  Normally she wouldn’t want to touch that water because there’s a fair share of trash in it, but jumping over water is pretty awesome, so she just had to give it a try too.  What a fun day!  🙂

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