Eurovision

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , ,
17 May 2009
0

Another year and another Eurovision has gone by.  It’s been two years since I was first introduced to this European contest and it still holds fond memories.  My flatmate Llama was obsessed with it (as well as Any Dream Will Do) andeurovision insisted that we have a little party in her room to watch.  And so, we gathered our blankets and pillows, brought tons of snacks, and sat down to watch the finalists perform their songs for their respective countries.  Some of the performances were very cheesy, some were cheery, and some were angsty.  All in all it was a great time though, just us friends enjoying it together, happily munching away all the while.  What more could you ask for?

This year, as with last, the contest has flown by me and I didn’t get a chance to watch it.  I feel like it’s one of those things you can only really enjoy with people who understand what it is.  Much like watching the Super Bowl with my British classmates is just not the same.  You don’t get into the right mindset, complete with random silly traditions.  And thus, I’ve never felt compelled to watch it again, though I do make a note of when it happens.  The year that I watched, Serbia won, though my favorite song was the angsty one I alluded to earlier, submitted by Finland.  Greece had a perky one that is quite fun to listen to and Britain had a super cheesy one that was also quite naughty.

Each year, whichever country wins traditionally hosts the next year’s event, so judging by this year’s Moscow location, Russia must have won in 2008.  It’s quite cool how this event unites so many countries, yet at the same time, it is laced with politics.  Another flatmate of mine, Activist, said he loves to watch Eurovision just to see how political relationships between countries are, since the voting largely reflects that (each country casts their vote, only restricted from voting for themselves, so you can imagine the types of alliances that can come of this).  There have been a lot of changes to how the voting mechanism works, from jury voting to public voting to some sort of hybrid in between.  I don’t know if they can ever settle on something that everyone agrees on, but every year the competition goes on.

In a sense, Eurovision was the original “Idol” type show, except it was more for country pride and international interaction than personal advancement.  However, there have been some notables to come from the contest over the years, including ABBA and Celine Dion.  And of course, contestants don’t vote amongst themselves, but are at the mercy of their country when it comes to these smaller scale (in the sense of individuals against each other rather than countries – the audience reach certainly isn’t small) shows.  Think of it as a European musical Olympics of sorts.

If I ever am back in England during this time of year, I’ll make sure I find some old friends and catch the upcoming Eurovision broadcast.  Until then, I’ll think back on those lovely days in my flat, having slumber parties and pigging out as we enjoyed each other’s company.  Ah, those were the days.

Anything but the “normal” job recruiting process!

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , ,
16 May 2009
1

From the way that I grew up, I now constantly need new stimulation, new faces, new situations.  For the first time in my life, I am sitting at a desk all day long, expected to do work for the most part of the day.  At first during K-12 schooling, I sat in a desk a lot, being talked at (and taking some notes from that).  Then in college I sat in any given class for no more than two hours at a time.  I also made an effort to schedule my classes in the afternoon, since I knew I wouldn’t make morning classes.  I’ve always been a night owl, feeling most calm and productive late at night, when the rest of my  community had gone to bed.  So one of the ways I retained my freedom was by staying up as I pleased.  In my housing segment, I was well-known for being up reliably late.  Queen of All-Nighters, even.

So back to constant new experiences.  Of the ten jobs I’ve held prior to this one, three required sitting, but for no more than 4 hours.  I don’t know if it’s because I’ve never had a conventional full-time job or what, but I certainly can’t sit at a desk and concentrate on my work for a full day.  I need breaks to move around, or rest, or do something else.  Anything else.  I’m not used to this office atmosphere, as casual and welcoming as it is.   That then begs the question: what type of work can I do?  Well, I need a lot of variety.  I need to go out and meet clients or visit sites.  I need to be able to write a proposal one day and do research the next day.  I’ve found I have trouble spending two days in a row doing the same thing if it requires a lot of energy.

Not only is my preference for how I work a bit… distracted, the way that I go about getting these jobs also tends to be rather unusual.  Let’s explore:

Job #1, waitress/bus boy at Home Bon Buffet: asked the manager if he needed anyone to work there when my parents and I were eating there one night.  Left my number and got a call a couple weeks later and started work.

Job #2, swim instructor at local YMCA: got stopped while swimming laps on April Fool’s 2002 and asked by manager if I wanted to work there.  Thought it was a joke, but he followed through and ended up teaching Polliwogs and Guppies.

Job #3, production intern (<–check out my IMDb listing!) for an independent film company (No Matter Productions): got an e-mail saying I was referred from another internship I had applied for that was already full.  Went in for interview and started working that day.

Job #4, textbook reader for blind students through UCLA Office for Students with Disabilities: saw the ad through classes I was enrolled in, e-mailed, can’t remember if there was an interview, and started to get work.

Job #5, financial intern at Smith Barney: found listing on myUCLA, e-mailed, interviewed, and arranged summer hours.  The most standard and normal as it gets, I guess (except not one of those with multiple interviews).

Job #6, product demonstrator for Natural Selection Promotions: bugged one of my fraternity brothers about taking a job I wanted that another brother had told us she was leaving.  He then told me his friend had a contact, so I e-mailed with resume and was soon told to arrange time for training to start.

Job #7, marketing intern for UCLA Live!: heard about it through a fraternity brother while studying abroad, forget if I e-interviewed or called on Skype.

Job #8, computer lab concierge for UCLA Office of Residential Life: another opportunity from a fraternity brother, though I was aware of it from my Resident Assistant the year before.  MSN interviewed while in England.

Job #9, “Scribe” (campus rep) for Livescribe: and still, something from my fraternity, happened upon their Scribe program when looking at their Facebook page.  Filled out form to apply, got phone interview.

Job #10, Orientation Counselor for UCLA Orientation Program: saw a flier, was reminded of a dream I had my entire undergraduate career, and applied.  Also rather normal, did one interview, a group interview, and a follow-up.

Job #11, Assistant Manager for Caelan & Sage: Marylin was working there and felt that I should too, so she proposed it to the boss and it was cool.  Had a Skype meet-up to solidify things and meet each other.

I don't mind corporate wear, but corporate culture? Not so much.

I don't mind corporate wear, but corporate culture? Not so much.

So generally, I didn’t go through the “normal” process of career fairs or online job listings and most of them, though requiring interviews, were quite simple and straightforward.  Of course, I simplified a lot of this and it was just like the jobs were handed to me.  Usually my resume spoke for itself and some other e-mail or phone interactions cemented things.  But overall, it was a whole lot less complicated than the convulted things you need to do these days… attend job/career fairs like mad and suck up to the recruiters, send follow-up e-mails and maintain a relationship, get an internship in hopes of being invited full-time when you graduate or apply and go in for behavioral interviews, one after another.  Me?  I have no patience for any of that.  I attended one career fair and hated it, so thereafter I swore I’d do things on my own terms.

I guess that’s why I want to be an entrepreneur and do consulting!  It offers much more interesting new work and opportunity to do things my way.

Entertainment and the internet’s disadvantages outside the states

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , ,
15 May 2009
0
dsc04568

Can you read it? It says: "Catch Bones as early as 24 hours after the USA telecast."

Being one who never really paid attention to TV shows or movies, I didn’t know about the glaring disparity between when shows were available in the US and when they became available internationally. It wasn’t until I studied abroad in England that it started to be more apparent. When I first arrived in Scotland on my way to my school, I saw an ad for a movie that had been advertised back home three months earlier and was already old news. It was then that I started to learn about the time delay in getting things abroad.  It seems that since Hollywood is the hub for entertainment, most shows produced are in the states, done according to our laws.  Once it is something that needs to be prepped for an international audience though, it takes time for licensing, screening, and of course, translated subtitles or voice-overs.  I guess it really surprised me that that’s how it is in the UK because there’s no need for all the translation worries, so it really just comes down to legal issues.

Another thing I was surprised by was how what was legal to watch in the states was not legal outside of it.  So, I was promptly blocked from sites like Hulu once they detected my IP to be outside the allowed territories.  This I can understand, since American laws can only have jurisdiction over Americans and does not extend to foreigners in other countries.  Their own local companies would have to come up with some sort of agreement with the TV stations themselves.  Ok, I can accept that.  I’ll have to find more local sites to offer me these perks.

I was reminded of this a few weeks ago, when Marylin was going through her “CSI Supreme Sunday” fix, watching hours of the various versions of the show all day.  One of the episodes was a two-part series to be continued the following week and of course, not wanting to wait, I went online to search for it.  It turns out that episode originally aired around a year old!  Shocked, I was reminded of that very first encounter I had with this idea of delayed entertainment and a filtering process that blocks people in other countries from seeing things as soon as Americans generally get to.  Of course, films that were created by non-Americans are exceptions, but nearly all American-made productions experience this red tape or whatever it is.

Today, however, I was surprised to find that Angels and Demons is released worldwide at pretty much the same time in most countries.  I don’t know if movies are more likely to get through international barriers or if this is a sign of changing times and a cohesion developing around the globe.  Maybe this movie is merely an exception to the rule, seeking out all international approval before deciding to release it anywhere.  Whatever the case, I think more shows should opt for this (what’s the point in making other audiences wait?).  I can see that potentially a lot of traffic is driven to online sites that offer free viewings of these productions.  I’m sure broadcasting and theater companies would prefer to have them seen on the big screen and on TV instead!

Slightly off-topic, but still related is websites that don’t allow access outside the US, like the Opt Out Prescreen site, the free annual credit report site, and US-only retailers.  The Opt Out Prescreen to reduce junk mail and credit card offers I can understand because if you’re not in the states you can’t possibly be receiving junk mail now.  The one thing I can see is if you are having your mail held while you’re away and don’t want to come back to find piles of outdated junk offers.  However, I feel like the free credit report that we are allowed by law each year should not be limited to being seen to only when you are in the country.  After all, I’m still using my US-based credit cards for all charges, which is affecting my credit, is it not?  So why can I not check up on that if I’m temporarily living out of the country?

Even worse are the retailers that do not let you even look at their site because they serve only on American soil, like cowboom.com.  I was so confused about why they blocked me that I even sent them an e-mail explaining the various scenarios in which I should be able to access their site (and how they’re losing out on potential customers):

1. I am a foreigner who wants to buy a gift for someone I know in the states and have it shipped to them directly

2. I am a citizen who is just out of the country for awhile and I want to buy a gift for someone back home while I’m away (or this period could be more extended)

3. I am a citizen who is currently out of the country, but wanted to buy something to have by the time I got back (which was the case for me)

Honestly, what are you thinking?  If you didn’t track my IP address, I’d look like any of your other customers, using an American credit card mailing to an American address.  Well, good for them, they’ve lost my business.  And unless I get an e-mail back from them apologizing and undoing this, I’m certainly never going to use them, even when I’m back and have full access again.

Growing up in the states we are often so sheltered and privileged.  It’s not just this, but many deeply important ways as well, from the freedoms we have to the things we take for granted and never knew others don’t get.  If only for that reason, I think Americans should get out and not just visit, but immerse themselves in other countries and cultures, especially the ones that are more dissimilar to ours.  Otherwise, you may never know about these differences in seemingly given things that complicate the rest of the world.

California controversy

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , ,
14 May 2009
1
photo credit: examiner.com

photo credit: examiner.com

I’m sure most of you have heard about the news earlier this week surrounding Miss California Carrie Prejean, whose title was in danger of being taken away.  Although it mostly seems to be about her answer to a question about same-sex marriage in the Miss USA pageant, it appears that she also shirked some of her responsibilities.  Now being that I just posted my thoughts on the New York bill, my opinion is clear and I support equality for same-sex couples.  Obviously, I don’t agree with what she said, but I think Trump made a solid decision in allowing her to keep her crown (assuming she now shows up to the engagements she’s supposed to be going to).

First of all, she answered the question respectfully and gracefully (or at least as best she could), starting off saying how she thinks it’s great that we live in a country that allows a choice.  This signals to me that though she may not agree with the idea, she is still ok with others feeling that way and choosing to live they way they want.  Her only reference to why she believes that is because that was how she was raised (any guess on what that means?  Religion, anyone?).  So I give her credit for not saying anything about how the Bible or God taught her it was wrong (of course I’m assuming here that her opinion was from a religious upbringing).

It was, admittedly, a tough and extremely charged question.  Nobody could have walked away from that without disapproving stares from someone.  So to a certain extent, she was set up for failure.  And from what I saw, she handled it well, not afraid to stand up for her opinion, but also very careful in how she talked about it.  Granted, some choice of words were odd, but that’s expected under pressure like that, plus beauty pageants tend to be known for the… interesting vocabulary and grammar that their contestants use.  So all in all, I don’t blame her for how she handled the situation.

I think it was important for her to keep her role to show people that you will not be persecuted for your beliefs and can be treated fairly for expressing your honest opinion.  Yes, maybe she won’t be a great role model for those looking to accept same-sex relationships, but she will be a role model for standing her ground without disrespecting the other side.  We are a country built on freedom of speech and expression, so that is important to maintain.  However, we are also a country supposedly built on freedom and equality – where is that?  But that’s beyond the scope of this situation and is a much larger beast to tackle.  Everyone who looks up to Miss California can rest assured that she was not thrown out for her opinions, or else they may feel that they need to hide their true selves to fit into this world.

But, I don’t agree with her position and I hope that she’ll open her mind to why she was so strongly spoken against due to this issue.  It’s not a small thing to be brushed aside and as a public figure, she will have her run-ins with it.  Change does not come easily, but I hope that she’ll discover how unfair this whole situation is.  Unfortunately, this is a very heated issue, so any mention of it can result in things getting blown out of proportion.  Not that I feel the issue is not important, but, in the end, everyone is still entitled to their opinion and the only thing you can try to do is change that.  So I think rather than publicly berating her, LGBT organizations should try to arrange some meetings with her to discuss the issues.  Keep it calm and civil and you just may get somewhere.

AquaNotes: preserving inspiration

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , ,
13 May 2009
3

I follow @modite on Twitter, who works for @alice, a start-up that makes errands easier, faster, and cheaper (at least this is my understanding of it – they’re still finishing up beta testing, so I don’t really know yet).  Through her, I found out that they’re currently doing a promotional giving away AquaNotes, which are these waterproof pads.  I think that’s pretty amazing!  Basically the product is designed for placement in your shower so you can write stuff as you wash up.  No longer do I have to dry off before jotting down notes of random ideas that pop in my head (and risk losing those thoughts in the process).  Now, whenever I think of an idea for a blog post, an interesting observation to share, errands I need to run, or I suddenly remember something that happened or an item that I want to get someday, I can write it down!

aquanotesThose of you who have read the description to the right will know that this blog is based on all the things that I jot down in my “fat lil’ notebook.”  I write down everything I think of that is notable in it, including books to read, places to go, names I like, things to stock up in my pantry when I have one again, ideas for a wedding, and so much more.  You can see it’s pretty random stuff, so I never know when I’ll think of another item to add to my collection of lists.  Now I never need to worry about soaking the notebook and risking losing everything!  With AquaNotes, I can just write it all down as it comes to me and easily transfer it over to the appropriate list as needed.  I’m really excited to actually experience this product, since it’s an extension of something I already do.  I’m a “shower thinker,” as they say.

It would also be fun to leave messages to those that I share my shower with, or stick up a sheet outside and not have to worry about if it’s going to rain or not.  Plus, whenver I go to the pool, I can bring it along to write down whatever strikes me as I lap around the pool and get lost in my thoughts.  As a swimmer, this is truly an invaluable product, since I can use it during workouts, at the hot tub relaxing afterwards, or in the locker room showering after that!  They even provide you with a water resistant pencil to write with, complete with holder.  All items suction onto the wall to be easily accessible.  The possibilities with this are endless!  And you know what the best part is?  It’s environmentally friendly!  Not only are the pads recyclable, they’re non-toxic and printed with soy-based ink.  How cool is that?!  I love green products.

Same-sex marriage

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , ,
13 May 2009
1

New York has passed a bill allowing same-sex marriage and I hope that this will push California to do the same.  It was one of the most disappointing moments in my life when Prop 8 was passed and gay rights activists had to go back to the drawing board to strategize about how to change people’s minds.  I think a lot of the problem here is that people recognize marriage as both a social and religious institution, but not a political one, when in fact the legal implications are the most vital.  When it comes down to it, it’s unfair to strip certain people of rights because they don’t fit the religious concept of marriage.  If marriage was purely a religious implication, it wouldn’t be a problem because the law would not be involved and individuals would not be barred from legal benefits.  But the fact of the matter is that the main reason it is not being recognized legally is because of personal beliefs related to religion.

A symbolic gay marriage on the UCLA campus. So beautiful.

A symbolic gay marriage on the UCLA campus. So beautiful.

If you look at marriage from a secular point of view, there’s nothing limiting what gender the two are.  I thought our law was supposed to be secular, no?  In that case, why is religious reasoning allowed into legal debate?  I just don’t get it.  Perhaps we need to separate marriage and legal unions.  Marriage can keep its religious references and celebrations that are only recognized by the church, the temple, the mosque, what have you.  Legal unions should be fair to everyone, recognized by the law with all the tax discounts, inheritance rights, and government, employment, medical, death, family, housing, and other legal rights.  (See how much gay couples are missing out on?)  How terrible is it to not allow a life partner to visit their loved one because they are not legally recognized as next-of-kin?  How can you stand by and not let a couple adopt a needy child just because they are not seen as “married”?  Or how would you like it if your loved one was touted away by immigration officials because your marriage is seen as null?  Honestly, have some heart here.

Same-sex marriages do nothing to harm you personally.  Maybe you don’t agree with the idea that two people of the same gender should be together, but is that really your decision to make?  I really don’t like it when people go around thinking they can impose their way of life on others.  All these people are doing is trying to live as mainstream a life as possible and not be shunned or even persecuted for their preferences and choices.  I thought religion was supposed to make you a better person.  Is that not why you put your faith into some being that can’t be proved?  In the hopes that you will be enlightened and achieve more?  Whatever happened to the ideals of tolerance and acceptance?  It’s like what if one day you’re told that you’re not allowed more than two children because that is considered acceptable in the context of what a “marriage” is?  When you have more children, you aren’t harming others, but some people may disagree with a large number of children since that means less time and fewer resources dedicated to each one.  So what if one day you wake up and people have decided that it’s irresponsible to have a large family?  That if you had a third child you would lose all legal rights as a couple?

Are people just that stubborn in their old, outdated ways?  If you can accept sex before marriage, divorce, and other deviations from the image of what a “real” marriage is like, then why not this?  Times are changing and they are changing drastically and fast.  The way I see it, same-sex marriage is inevitable.  We’re headed that way just like decades ago forward-thinking people knew we were headed towards desegregation and gender equality.  If you look at the issue closely, you’ll realize that those long-held opinions are antiquated.  It’s time for change and change is inevitable.  Putting it off is only going to exacerbate the problem and leave a community torn and bitter.  A few years down the line are we going to need affirmative action for LGBTs?  Are we going to have to go back to the cycle that tries to right a wrong and then just creates more chaos and debate?  Has a lesson not been taught and learned by what happened due to racism, ethnic divisions, and gender inequality?

How about preventing the issue of feeling like you need to make something up to this group by not doing anything you’ll need to make up to them later!  (In other words, before you get so entrenched in denying people based on sexuality, much like people were shunned based on race or discriminated against due to gender, why don’t you take a walk through the history books to see the mess that caused.)  Why not some prevention before this escalates?  It’s about more than that, but at a very basic level this is just setting things up for a repeat of historical patterns.  Will we never learn?  Nothing irks me more than racism, sexism, and… sexualitism?  Don’t discriminate on the basis of sexuality.  Everyone deserves their own happiness.

So please, people.  Open your eyes.  Open your mind.  Open your hearts.

Opinions brewing

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , , , ,
12 May 2009
0

EnneagramI have realized, in my many attempts to get a satisfactory answer to what I fall under in the Enneagram types and justify my behavioral preferences in Emergenetics, that I am much more opinionated than I may seem to be.  Answering the questions they pose has gotten me deeply introspective about my emergeneticsperson.  According to my profile, I should be more assertive than I feel I am and far more ready to express my opinions.  Yet, I find that I hold my tongue a lot and keep my thoughts to myself, save for some ranting to Panda (poor guy) and occasional references to it in my writing.  As I started to reflect more on what kind of a person I am and how I interact with and fit into the world, I began to see that yes, I am rather assertive and gregarious about how I feel.  It’s just that few things seem important enough for me to actually express my thoughts on it, so I usually opt to keep it in rather than allow any brashness to come out and hurt others.

This is where I keep my spontaneity in check, to ensure the peace is not disturbed unless I just can’t contain it anymore or determine that the benefits of doing so outweigh the costs.  I’m a very analytical person, so I prefer to sit around thinking about my options, weighing them in turn.  I tend to see many points of view, so it takes me time to process them all and evaluate the best course of action.  Internally I may be fuming, but externally I am quiet and withdrawn as I retreat to my thoughts to digest what is going on.  I like to fantasize and get lost in my imagination to escape what bothers me in this world and dream up scenarios in which problems could be aired out.  Yet because of this, I tend to miss the boat and if and when I decide it’s time to react, the time has passed and it would be inappropriate for me to bring up and address the issue again.  I don’t like to be confrontational, so I often try to express my feelings by saying things that can suggest how I really think about things.  Because of this, I often feel suppressed and, in a sense, shackled.

So, it’s not that I don’t stand up for what I believe in; I’m actually quite stubborn and adamant about the things I’m truly vested in, mentally and emotionally.  Once I do get going, I don’t like to back down and I can get very passionate in promoting my thoughts.  I’m also the type to notice a lot of details and can get primed to notice ones that annoy me more and more, which then starts to wear away at my patience.  Sometimes what it takes to get me to cross the threshold into openly expressing my opinion is just that process of getting weary of putting up with something.  At some point, I reach a level that then pushes me to release my ideas to the world.  Usually this stuff is not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, so I have learned to filter everything through a screening process to allow myself time and force myself to reason to see what doesn’t really matter in the end.  I guess giving myself the opportunity to mull things over is my own way of counting to ten.

It’s an interesting observation about myself that I always knew, but haven’t really explored (at least not lately).  Most of my frustrations stem from this tendency and I’m trying to find a way of handling it that doesn’t shortchange me and my reactions.  I hate stepping on toes though, so I tend to just get walked all over.  I’ve thought about setting a designated time to bring up these issues so I can get it out there without being in the heat of the moment, but I can’t bring myself to even get that going.  By the time I want to, I’ve convinced myself that it’s really not that big a deal and I don’t want to be petty.  Yet, time and time again it just comes back to haunt me and grate away at my nerves.  Am I undervaluing myself?  Or am I just being too observant, too anal?  I need to find more peace in my life.  A deeper sense of calm and contentment.  To an extent, I wish I was as easy-going and relaxed as Zen always appears to be.

To the haters out there

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , ,
11 May 2009
1

Last week I saw a tweet from David Choi talking about the nasty racist comments he got on his YouTube account, due to the fact that he’s Asian.  It made me wonder why people go out of their way to be cruel like that (not that I’ve seen what was written, but I don’t need to).  Especially in a case like this, you really have to go out of your way to send hate messages.  Why bother going to someone else’s page, where they’re just sharing their work, their lives?  I really don’t understand it.  I mean, it’s one thing if you’re thinking them in your mind and you just can’t think of someone nicely, but it’s a whole other thing to go attack them.  I’ll admit, I’ve had my share of negative and unpleasant thoughts, but I keep it to myself.  If I really have to get it out, I’ll tell a friend to blow off some steam, write it down to get it out of my mind, or exert myself physically to wear myself out.

Just this weekend this girl serving me boba was extremely rude and disrespectful, but I held my tongue and just imagined giving her a piece of my mind.  Actually doing so would have served no purpose but to waste my time and energy and either make her even meaner or feel terrible.  So instead, I told Panda about it and “screamed” (only online AAAAHHHs and UGHs) to get it all out.  I’d all but forgotten it today, except when a comment reminded me of it (talking about how some people are just not polite or gracious at all).  I told Lorrie about it quite calmly and I’ve found I’m at peace with it now.  But for this case, there was an actual reason for my anger and frustration!

As for David’s haters, I don’t know what’s going.  What has he done to possibly annoy anyone?  Maybe I just can’t see because I’m a fan of his work, as I anticipate Miley Cyrus’s fans would not understand why her voice grates on my nerves and anything about her makes me want to gag.  Even though I feel very strongly against her, I don’t go to her website to tell her these harsh words.  Everyone’s entitled to an opinion, no matter how ridiculous it might be, but that doesn’t entitle them to take any negative ones they have about someone and shove it down that person’s throat.  It’s crude and poor judgment.  If you don’t like it, don’t pay attention!  There’s so much more in the world for you to be appreciating, rather than seeking out what you don’t and making it inescably obvious.

This, of course, only applies when no harm is being done.  If people are being hurt by a person’s actions, then this type of avoidance and complacency tactic is countereffective.  As for those who are victimized by such thoughtless acts, I hope you can rise above it and not shoot unsavory comments back.  Either ignore it because it’s not worth your time or reply in a firm, but respectful manner.  This world could use more kindness and dignity.

The inevitable Mother’s Day post

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , , , , ,
10 May 2009
0

I like to be strange, different, unusual.  So, it’s almost too cliche to write about my love for my mother on Mother’s Day.  Not that I don’t like the idea – I certainly appreciate my mom and enjoy celebrating her role in my life!  However, it seems all to predictable to be writing about motherhood on this day.  I’m sure a good majority of the world is doing so and the blogosphere is alight with posts of a similar sentiment.  Even on Twitter, the most trending term is “Happy Mother’s Day.”  But, filial piety and maternal love win out in the end and I concede to do something all too normal and expected.  That’s my tribute to my mom, I guess.

When I ran into Marylin’s mother outside in the living room today, I made a point to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day and inquire about her plans.  I was vaguely aware of dinner plans she and Marylin had with family friends, but I wasn’t sure if it was just a normal gathering or if the holiday would be acknowledged.  I guess it was kind of just a random gathering also meant to celebrate a friend’s birthday.  So celebrate away!  Celebrate all there is to celebrate on this day.  What struck me the most though, was her initial reaction to my well wishes: “Oh, I’d forgotten all about that.”  It reminded me so much of my mother and I asked Panda if his mother is the same way too.

You see, my mom’s the type of person who doesn’t remember Mother’s Day or her birthday, or any other day out there that’s meant to celebrate her.  I have a theory that she only remembered her birthday long enough for me to be old enough to remember it for her and now it’s just a fleeting memory in her mind.  So, every year, it’s up to me to remind her that, this is your day and I’m taking you out to eat, as our family tradition goes.  Over the years we’ve ended up going to the same Asian buffet for every holiday that we celebrate together, whether it’s Mother’s or Father’s Day, Christmas, or one of our birthdays.  We don’t make a big fuss out of these things and they pass rather quietly, but I make a point of never forgetting.  It’s one of the most basic ways I can show that I care.

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Well, it turns out that not all mothers are like this and Panda’s mom quite likes to be recognized, at least in comparison with my mom.  I think I’ll be the type who won’t bring it up in the hopes that I will be remembered.  I asked Panda if he’d remember all the important days to celebrate and though he was reluctant to promise at first, in case something comes up, he eventually agreed to extend that promise to me.  After all, I realize that life gets in the way and I’m really only asking for his word that he’ll try his best, which I know he will.

So back to my wonderful mother.  Currently she and my dad are in LA again, so I hope they go out to a nice place to eat.  As the truly dedicated mom that she is, she’s helping me with my taxes and finances.  She was always the one I turned to for all things money related.  Right now she’s in a stage in her life where she isn’t sure what to do.  Before I left for Singapore, I spent my time trying to give her the confidence and hope that she needs to perhaps take a leap and go for her dreams.  After all, they were put off because she chose to take care of me fully, rather than be distracted by a job.  So now that she’s back in the work force, doing environmental consulting work with my dad, she’s looking to do more of what interests her.  And that is something in the aerospace industry, preferably along the lines of designing planes.  She feels like she’s too old and there isn’t a foothold for her to grasp in the industry.  The unfortunate thing is that employers don’t even want to consider her because she’s not as young and fresh as college graduates and she took so many years off from practicing her engineering expertise.  They don’t trust her to be as sharp and capable as she used to be, even though she has been teaching herself programs like AutoCAD and attended some courses at our community college.  How do you get people to give you a chance though?

So for now, she’s helping my dad out in his company, building up her resume again as she tries to think of how to get into Boeing or Northrup or Lockheed and the likes of them.  I fully support her and hoep that she can achieve what she wants, after all those years she gave up for me.  She gave me a privileged life growing up, with a mom who could always drop off a project I forgot to take to school with me, or drive me to the various swim and track practices and meets, or pick me up from school after all my extracurricular activities were over.  I remember when I was young I won a competition for writing about why I have the world’s best mom and I still have that essay to this day.  When I read it, it doesn’t seem all that exciting since I wrote it when I was in fifth grade, but apparently it was good for my age!

I hope everything is well with her now and I wonder where she’ll be when I return to LA.  I’m keeping a lookout for her, in case I hear of any opportunities that she may want to look into.  For now though, all I can do is be a good daughter and call her periodically to check in.  I think I really surprised her when I did that like two weeks ago.  We’re not a family built around constant contact and communication.

With that, I hope that everyone has spent some time to think about their own mothers and remember all the things they should be appreciated for.

A Bruin is Forever

laelene Post in general blog，Tags: , , , ,
09 May 2009
0

ucla-dayToday was UCLA Day at my beloved university.  This whole weekend just makes me miss my college experience.  It’s only the second time that UCLA has done this, inviting alum back for exclusive tours, lectures, and gatherings to reunite with old friends and make new ones.  I really wish I was around to experience it and I can’t wait until when I am.  This year, Rachel Robinson, a UCLA grad and Jackie Robinson’s widow, was on campus to receive the UCLA Medal from Chancellor Block, for all her hard work and dedication to education.  I remember last year when they were starting the inaugural UCLA Day, banners went up all over campus and tables and stages were set up for the day.  And it’s not just this – there’s also Dance Marathon, the Festival of Books, Spring Sing, etc.

I joined the Alumni Association as a Lifetime Member when I was buying my cap and gown and diploma frame last summer.  Because of that, I have some nice UCLA memoribilia, including license plate frames, padfolios, and a mug.  I bought a fancy tassel to hang in the car and I can’t wait to continue to collect UCLA gear, adding to my vast collection of clothes, binders and folders, keychains, and even a baseball cap (though I don’t wear them).  I’m a sucker for all things UCLA and I’ll buy nearly anything with my alma mater tastefully included in the design.  I’d stop short of buying a blue and gold car with the logo on the sides though.  Otherwise, my devotion runs deep and I can’t wait to take advantage of everything as an alumna.  I’ve gotten exclusive invitations to hear Coach Howland and Neuheisel speak about next year’s seasons, special ticket access for Spring Sing, and of course, an invitation to attend UCLA Day.  There are also special discount offers and exclusive sales/coupons e-mailed to me.  This is all fine and dandy, but useless to me unless I am in the area.

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I even have this worn-out sticker on my laptop.

So, I really look forward to when I am back in LA again and I hope I can make time for all these events.  I love feeling connected to the school and I am ever so loyal.  I got a peek at Panda giving a housing tour today and it made me miss the campus so much.  I would love to give tours as well!  I wonder if there’s a part-time position that allows alum to give tours…  That would be nice.  I love more than anything to show others the beautiful campus and explain to them the history and tradition we are steeped in.  I think Orientation tours are the best, because it’s a unique experience offered only incoming freshman.  They get a special edition, hearing about the campus from an insider’s point of view.  I think I’d really enjoy giving any sort of tour though.

So, as the saying goes, “A Trojan is only good once, but a Bruin is FOREVER.”

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